Animal jokes
My dad said, "Where's Pickles, the family cat?" I said, "I'm sorry to say he's in the sky." He said, "Oh, I see, he passed away." No, I strapped him to 20 fireworks!
What's the difference between a goat and a sex slave?
I don't have a slave in my sex dungeon.
What's a fish without eyes?
A fsh.
Why can't you have a tall dog? You will have pups in a week.
What is large, grey, and it doesn't matter? An Irrelephant! Hahahahahahahahaha! Hahaha!
hmmm
What do you call a pile of kittens? A meowntain.
I am starting a frog cult now!
Why do you not play with a cheetah? Because they cheat!
What is a four-legged animal called that can fly?
A donkey flying in the sky running away from me.
A dolphin swims into a bar and looks at the menu. He calls the bartender and orders a pint of ginger-whale.
Yo mama so fat, she had to get baptized at SeaWorld!
Q: What did the Buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
A: Bison.
A kid came to the orphanage with a dead fish. She was crying.
Why was the kid crying in the orphanage? Because someone came for the fish.
Where does a cow take his date?
Answer: To the moooooovies!
Yo mama so ugly, she has a sign in her garden saying, “Beware of the dog!”
Why did you and Sarah break up?
'Cause she cheetahed on me.
What do you call a hippo that lays eggs? A eggoppotimos.
I would give you a thrashing, but that would be animal abuse.
I felt bad for a dog, and I looked to my left, and there was an orphan, and I said I will make you a website, and I said there won't be a homepage.
I met a talking lizard. The doctor told me he had ereptile dysfunction! 🦎