Animal jokes
Meow meow, I'm a cow and I like cum cum cum.
A magician walks up to a girl and asks her to feel the rabbit in the magician's hat.
The magician asks the girl to rub the rabbit. The girl notices the rabbit sticks up and drools; the hat was covering the hips.
You're so fat that people say you're the biggest bird!
What do cheetahs like?
Sports!
Suck my cheetah.
The cheetah and lion are racing. The cheetah wins.
The lion says, "Man, you a cheetah."
The cheetah says, "Nah, you lion!"
What goes zzub zzub zzub?
A fly flying backwards!
Your mum is so fat, when she slept on the bed, the bed cracked and they had to replace it by a dinosaur.
I have a fish that can breakdance! Only once though, and only for 20 seconds...
I killed my cat.
Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.
The shark bit me and I feet red down my legs.
I brought a cow and named him Mayo.
Mayo Neighs!
Your momma's so fat, she went on safari and got shagged by an elephant!
When do cows moo? Moosday.
How do you f**k a duck?
Usually duck a f**k.
What does a hear-moo say? "Fat cow!"
Why did the chicken cross the road why? Because they wanted to kick someone in the family.
Why can’t monkeys play in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
How long was the owl trick or treating?
Owl night long!