Animal jokes
What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig?
One’s a heated yam, and the other’s a YEATED HAM!
How do u make an octopus laugh?
Ten-tickles! Hahaha.
Why you gay, bruh? I know why I'm gay. I got the wolf pack protectors spirit in me, YA BOIIIII!
A dog found a bone. Then he was walking happily across the street, and he saw a bridge. He decided to walk on the bridge. He saw his reflection and thought it was another dog. Then he barked at him, and the bone fell in the river. The dog said, "What a fool I have been," and walked away.
What can a duck eat for a snack? Saltine quackers!
7000+ bats.
What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?
"Would you stop bugging me!"
What do you call a dog with no legs?
It doesn't matter, he's not coming.
What do you give a dog with a fever?
Mustard, it's the best thing for a hot dog!
Do fish have tits?
Fish tits.
What do you call a flying pig?
Fiction.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! Hahahahahaha!
Why would you not let an elephant sleep in the same bed with you?
Because they stink and now the room smells like elephant shit.
What's the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?
A rooster clucks defiance!
What did the chicken say when he saw a human running around uncontrollably?
"It's running around like a chicken with its head cut off!"
What do you say to your pet when you're super tired, slow, and worn out?
"I'm totally dogging it today..."
Holy cow!
What did the dog say when he got its tail caught in the door?
"It won't be long now..."
Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.
Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!
What do you call a cow that's on the ground? Ground beef.