Animal jokes
Bully: You're so short you hand-glide on a chip.
Short person: Well, at least I don’t look like a giraffe that just came out of an oven!
What do you call a cow that sleeps?
A bulldozer! 🐄💤
What has a dog?
People.
Wy can't a dinosaw ror? Becase it losed it's voucal kord.
What is a dog that is awesome? A smart dog.
I love ❤️ dogs.
How does a cow do math?
With a cow-culator!
They killed a whole family of crows... It was a murder!
They killed a bunch of ravens... What a conspiracy!
What do you give a sick bird?
Tweet-ment!
A salamander came by me the other day and he AXOLOTL questions. Ba dum tss!!!
What kind of fish do people eat?
Deep-fried fish.
My girlfriend said to me, "Dear, I think you have hit an animal, there's blood and dents all over the bonnet."
I said, "No, love, I'm not waiting for a Black Lives Matter rally."
What did the horses say to the donkeys?
"Jackasses, please like!"
What's the difference between a goat and a sex slave?
I don't have a slave in my sex dungeon.
Never search up "monkey with blue balls."
I jump off a cliff and said I hate you, dumb blond, and eagle...Then I said to my wife, "We're done, Blondie," and said to my friend, "You're a dumbhead eagle!"
What's the difference between a sex slave and a goat?
I don't have a sex slave in my basement...
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Snow caps!
How long was the owl trick or treating?
Owl night long!
The fish do nothing. That is definitely a bad joke.