Animal jokes
What did the frog say to the pedophile?
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”
Biden: See you later, alligator!
Alligator: In a while, pedophile.
What do you call a brave octopus? Octobrave.
Four cows went to the county fair. They saw a sign that said that next year animals can enter a singing contest. They decided that they would enter next year. So they called their group the "4 Cs Quartet" since their names were Clementine, Candy, Cookie, and Columbine.
They discovered how they could win. After a discussion, they decided to eat as much corn as possible, so they would sing in perfect 4 part hominy.
#1 BEST ALPHA MALE PICKUP LINE
Why should you wrap your hamsters in duct tape?
So they don't explode when you f*** them.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because chickens are mindless creatures and do not know any better.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to the bitch house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
What did the man say to the girl?
You just milked a cow.
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
My grandfather has the heart of a lion!! 🦁
In a jar on his desk along with a lifetime ban from the zoo...
What is cats and dogs' favorite story and movie?
"Romeow and Drooliet!"
What do you call a pig?
Pig.
Why do elephants never get rich?
Because they work for peanuts!
What did one cat say to the other? Happy "meow"!
Why can't a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw you will be born soon.
What do cheetahs say?
"Cheese-ah!"
Who is white, hairy, and rusty in the tree?
It's Rambo Rabbit with a big gun that was.
What's the difference between a frog and a skyscraper? The frog can jump. Hahahahaha!