Animal jokes
My name is Gunter.
Gunter Gunter is dead.
Gunter Gunter stuffed my cat's head. ;D
What's a bull's favorite body part?
An eye-BULL!
What do you call a bunch of llamas?
Alpaca llama.
If there are 12 fish and 6 drown, how many are left?
12, because fish don't drown.
What do you call a cow without any legs?
Ground beef!
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhhahahaa
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the British bastard and get the egg roll.
What kind of star will come out in the daytime?
A starfish! 🐟🐠🐡🦐🦞🦀🦑🐙🦂
Why does a cow love music?
Because it can play a moo-sical instrument.
What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A dino-snore!
When do eggs hatch?
At the CRACK of dawn!
What has 4 legs, then 3 legs, then 2 legs, then 1 leg, then no legs?
A baby you cut one off each time.
What happens when a cow masturbates?
Beef jerky.
Kat, what? I did. A cat jump over the road because he believes he came flying in the clouds. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah! So funniest kitten kitten kitten kidding is my last time of Do you Joooooooooooooooooooooookin?
So, I was walking down the path of my life with Bigfoot, noticing the two pairs of footprints, mine and his.
One day, I notice his prints are gone. I look up to him and say, "You had promised you would always be there for me. How is this possible?"
He then looks me straight in the eyes and says, "Raw!"
What do you call a priest that is a furry?
A Catholic.
What do you do after you eat the softest pussy in the world?
Put the diapers back on.
Why did the robot cross the road?
Because he was programmed by the chicken!
What did the frog say to the pedophile?
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”
Biden: See you later, alligator!
Alligator: In a while, pedophile.