Animal jokes
What happens when a cow masturbates?
Beef jerky.
What kind of star will come out in the daytime?
A starfish! 🐟🐠🐡🦐🦞🦀🦑🐙🦂
Why does a cow love music?
Because it can play a moo-sical instrument.
Yo, look, they give me and my girl free pizza and a big bottle of rabbit wine. Yay, yay! Don't drink too much of it; you might turn into a wine rabbit.
My cat got run down. That is a cat-astrophe.
The chicken is so fat.
My dad walked in on me having sex with a dog. She gasped and shouted at me, "Get out of here, it's my turn!"
What do cows like to watch? Moovies.
What’s white and crunchy and swings through trees?
A meringue-atang.
When do eggs hatch?
At the CRACK of dawn!
What do you call a cross between a computer and a vampire bat?
Love at first byte! <3
Where do cows go on a holiday? Moo-Zealand! 😜
If you don't like my spelling, Explain Bear, have you realized I'm a duck and you are a bear? I've got more internet power and meme power, so shut the duck up and get a life and stay off my property and the internet.
Kat, what? I did. A cat jump over the road because he believes he came flying in the clouds. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hah! So funniest kitten kitten kitten kidding is my last time of Do you Joooooooooooooooooooooookin?
So, I was walking down the path of my life with Bigfoot, noticing the two pairs of footprints, mine and his.
One day, I notice his prints are gone. I look up to him and say, "You had promised you would always be there for me. How is this possible?"
He then looks me straight in the eyes and says, "Raw!"
What do you call a priest that is a furry?
A Catholic.
What do you do after you eat the softest pussy in the world?
Put the diapers back on.
Why did the robot cross the road?
Because he was programmed by the chicken!
What did the frog say to the pedophile?
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”