What did the Cheetah say to the Lion?
"I'm a Cheetah!"
Animal Jokes
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!
My grandfather has the heart of a lion!! 🦁
In a jar on his desk along with a lifetime ban from the zoo...
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
Why should you wrap your hamsters in duct tape?
So they don't explode when you f*** them.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting cow wh---
MOOOO!
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
A cat has claws at the end of paws; a comma is a pause at the end of a clause.
Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.
Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?
Me: Aren't you my son?
Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.
I just watched a program about beavers.
It was the best dam program I’ve ever seen!
What college do cows go to?
The Mooniversity.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because chickens are mindless creatures and do not know any better.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to the bitch house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
When my dog barks, he gets ruff.
What is cats and dogs' favorite story and movie?
"Romeow and Drooliet!"
What did the man say to the girl?
You just milked a cow.
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
What did one cat say to the other? Happy "meow"!
I am mis-steak.
What do you call a pig?
Pig.
Why do elephants never get rich?
Because they work for peanuts!
