Animal jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Rabid cow.
Rabid cow who?
Hold on, I need to get my gun....
My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.
A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"
If you don't like my spelling, Explain Bear, have you realized I'm a duck and you are a bear? I've got more internet power and meme power, so shut the duck up and get a life and stay off my property and the internet.
My cousin said he wonders why people have sex with animals, and now I can’t stop thinking about it.
Ol’ McDonald had a farm e-I-e-I-oh.
Pete the panther was racing a cheetah but lost. The cheetah said, "You can’t beat me, I’m a cheetah." Pete said, "Yeah, you are a cheetah cheetah."
A duck walks into a bar and buys everyone a round. He tells the bartender, “Put it on my bill.”
I just watched a documentary about beavers.
It was the best dam show I ever saw!
What did the rapper name his new DOG?
Lil Bark.
Why do cheetahs always win the race? Because he cheats, duh!
What did the mother cheetah say to her cub?
"Go to bed or I'll slap your spots off you!"
Why did the cheetah go to school?
To be a cheetah.
Why did the people get a chicken?
To make eggs.
My dog once went to Uranus. 🐶🤣🤣🤣
You know, because dogs sniff Uranus? 😂😂😂
You're more likely to be killed by a cow than by a shark.
Why can’t you play games with cats? Because they always ‘cheetah’.
Can bees fly in the rain?
Not if they don't have their yellow jackets!
What's a cow's favorite thing?
A mooooovie.
JAW don't know sh*t!
What kind of bear has no teeth?
A gummy bear.
What's a bull's favorite body part?
An eye-BULL!