If a tree could be any animal, what would it be?
Answer: A dog because of its bark lol. π
Animal Jokes
Why did the frog take the bus to work?
His car got toad.
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger.
What's the similarity between Christmas stuffing and my penis?
I like them both inside dead animals, because alive animals feel too much like men, and then I'd cum too quick.
Why did the cow want to be an astronaut?
Because it wanted to see the Milky Way!
What did Ahsan do?
Meow meow.
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.
The farmers were playing chess, and the winner shouted and said: "I killed your horse!"
The second quickly left, and when he returned he said: "We have poisoned all your cows!"
What's the easiest way to make a glow worm happy? Cut off its tailβit'll be delighted!
I can't take my dog to the pond anymore because the ducks keep attacking him. That's what I get for buying a pure bred dog.
I canβt take my dog to the park anymore.
Why?
The ducks keep trying to eat him.
Why would they do that?
Because heβs pure-bread.
What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?
"No, you ate my cock!"
What did the horse say after it tripped?
Help! Iβve fallen and I canβt giddyup!
Whatβs black and white and red all over?
A crushed nun!
Whatβs that black stuff between an elephants toes?
Slow natives.
Whatβs worse than spiders on your piano?
Craps on your organ.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
How do you make a cat say woof? You cover it in petrol and light a match.
What did the llama say when the villagers said that he had to leave the village?
"Alpaca my bags."
What do you call a donkey and a potato?
Assround
How do you get a koala to die? Kill it.
