Animal jokes
What happens when a cow farm gets destroyed, then built up again?
It'll be udder renovation!
A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."
The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
If Opposition Expunged thought he was an animal, what would Thearchy be called?
Therianarchy!
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
Which dinosaurs masturbated the most? Triceratops, they were the horniest!
What do you call it when a cow gets disciplined by her parents?
Grounded beef.
Why is it easy to weigh a fish?
Because they have their own scales.
What do frogs eat?
French fries!
What do you call mouse sneakers? Squeakers!
My friend has glasses, and we were talking about owls, and I told my friend to give an owl glasses. I told my friend that it'd be a spectacled owl!
What do you call a duck that can fix anything? Duck tape.
My girlfriend’s dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. But, unfortunately, it just made her more upset.
She screamed at me, “What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?”
Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the playground?
What did the policeman shout to the cow running away?
"Get to the ground, beef!"
Your mom is so fat, when she swam in the sea, Wales came up to her and said, "We are family, even now you’re fatter than me."
Guys, I'm back...
Here's my joke:
What is blue and red all over?
Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.
Why is it easy to weigh fish?
Because they have their own scales! 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Sometimes I am happy, and there are times I envy my dog.
What's a cow's strongest part of their body?
Their "calves"!
What do you call a scared cow?
A COW-ard.