Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications
Why couldn't the lizard get a girlfriend?
Because he had a reptile dysfunction!
what has two legs and is red all over?
half a cat
What is a cow's favorite drink?
Mountain Moo!
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
A cow is at his friend's house for a sleepover party. Sadly, all of the beds are taken. Where does the cow sleep?
On the COWch (couch)
What do you say when you see a pig making bread?
He's bacon.
Why was the cheetah so bad at hide and seek ? No matter where she hid, she was always spotted.
What did the priest say to the skunk?
Let us spray
What does a cigarette and a hamster have in common?
Both are completely harmless untill you put it in your mouth and light it on fire.
What’s the difference between a hoe and a roster? A roster says cockle doodle doo and a hoe says any cock will do
Why do Scottish men wear kilts?
Sheep can hear unzipping trousers from a distance of 100 yards.
What is the last thing that goes through a fly's head when it hits the windshield? It's butt.
What do you call cows that have a sense of humor? -- Laughing stock.
What do you call a short cow in tall grass? Udderly tickled :)
One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, "OH! THE HUMANATEE!"
what happened when the Cheetah took to many baths? He became spotless!!!
What do you call a deaf animal? Anything, it can't hear you.
What’s the difference between a aligator and a child?
You can’t abuse a aligator
So a bear and a rabbit are in field, the bear turns to the rabbit and asks, "does your poop stick to your fur?" And the rabbit replied, "no" and the bear then picks up the rabbit and wipes his butt.
