Animal jokes
What animal gets easily offended? The chicken; they always get roasted.
I talk about the girls in my math class simping over anime characters and making random ships as well as for Miraculous Ladybug children's show, whatever the show is called, but it's a kids show. 💀 Now they’re searching up pictures of Tom Holland laughing in their absolute weirdness.
I like Tom Holland, but these kids man, they like him like they’re in a relationship. They might as well start kissing and licking the screen. They’re probably writing fanfictions in their free time when they aren’t searching up kids show characters, anime characters, and Tom Holland pics on their SCHOOL CHROMEBOOK. Their only device choice was a school-provided laptop which is monitored by the school while they are writing fan fictions on Google Docs and searching up some weird Tom Holland stuff. Imagine how Tom Holland would feel if he found out that there are 11 year old girls searching up some weird stuff about him.
I would never kill an animal. I'm more of a people person.
Terrance M.
It is interesting how different nations have their dogs make different sounds.
An American dog goes Woof, a Czech dog goes Haf, a Dutch dog goes Blaf, and a Chinese dog goes Sizzle.
What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? -- One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.
What do you call an animal flouting?
Super bird!
What do you call an animal that knows karate? Moose Lee 😊😁
What do you call a sheep on steroids? A woolly mammoth.
Why do animals in polar regions have thick fur? Because they don't have a barber! 🤣 🤣 🤣
How does a fish always know how much they weigh? -- Because they have their own scales.
I want to die.
A preacher was selling a horse. A cowboy decided to buy the horse. The preacher told the cowboy to make the horse go, to say "Thank God" and to stop the horse, to say "Hallelujah". The cowboy then rode off into the sunset until he came upon a cliff, searching his memory he yelled "Hallelujah" and the horse stopped just before going off the cliff. Then the cowboy said "Thank God".
My friend has a dog who looks like cocoa. Her name is Cocoa!
I went on a date last night and told my date I worked with animals every day.
She said, "Oh, how sweet. What do you do?" I said, "I'm a butcher."
I really wanna hit you right now, but that would be animal abuse.
I went to the aquarium this weekend, but I didn’t stay long. There’s something fishy about that place.
Anime is good, like for yes, dislike for no. Comments for thoughts.
What do you call a cow you can’t see?
Camooflauged.
What's the difference between a duck?