Age jokes
Man, abortion jokes just don't get old, do they?
In fact, they don't age at all.
I like my wine like my women:
16 and in my basement.
Why are cops worried about drunk drivers and not elderly drivers?
Yo mama's so old, she was a waitress at the Last Supper.
"I told my mom I thought parenting got easier as the kids get older, and she laughed so hard she cried a little."
"Did you hear about the flasher who exposed himself to two elderly ladies in Central Park? One had a stroke. The other couldn’t quite reach."
I was born yesterday, and I walked down memory lane. I fell over the edge!
I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age, but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.
Samuel liked Batman when he was a kid.
He still is a kid.
Why couldn’t the underage orphan get on an adult-only website? Because you need your parents' consent.
Bro, this guy's hairline I saw the other day was nowhere to be seen.
Why can't an orphan get a tattoo at a young age?
They don't have parent permission.
Yo mama's so old, her social security number is one.
Yo mama so old,
her memory is black and white.
What's the difference between a Chinese person and an old person?
One lasts long and another doesn't.
Imagine if Joe Biden was elected for a second term.
He would be the first president to be assassinated by a slick bathtub.
If she’s old enough to breed, she’s old enough for me.
Which is better looking, girls or women?
A dad and son walk into a strip club. The people in the strip club said he was too young to be in here, so they had to leave. Ten years later, they went back there. They saw a small dancer. The father walked over there and said the woman looked too small to be in here. Her reply was... "I wasn't dancing ten years ago."
What do Nelson Mandela and Paul Walker have in common?
They both died at 95.