Age jokes

If you read this, you fucked your dad and your 4-year-old sister, you sick fuck... At least wait till they are 15.

What did Sally get for her 18th birthday? A brick.

Why did she get a brick? She hit 18.

What's the best thing about twenty-one year olds?

There's twenty-one of them.

What's the difference between a priest and a zit?

A: One waits until you're twelve to cum on your face.

I dated a German girl, it was very annoying when she kept on screaming her age and moaning.

Your mom is so old, she turned to dust before Thanos snapped.

Mom: You need to grow up. You're so immature.

Me: *glares* Get out of my castle....

Mom: It's a pillow fort.

Me: Why can't I have an imagination! ?

Mom: You're almost 19 years old.

Me: Not good enough... OUT!

I did so much research that I got bone-tired from doing this, tibia honest. You probably didn't find that humerus. I got a skeleton of these puns. I guess I could learn a femur puns. I was wondering if the creators of this site could talus how they come up with puns or maybe give some advice? I'm only 14 years old.

What did the 1.8 nanosecond old baby get for his birthday?

Nailed to a puppy falling on a buzz saw being crushed in a hydraulic press while being set on fire.

When your grandma says she's rusty but still manages to teach you.

Remember that 18 year old girl I set you up with?

Why not?

Too old.

I hate my birthday. For my first birthday my mom gave me my life. I liked it when it was new and fun. Now it's broken and sad and I wanna take it back.

Yo mama so old that when she farts, she farts dust!

I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.

She looked at me surprised.

(P.S. I am not at that age plus I am as straight as a helix ruler.)

My girlfriend is 19 and I'm 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant, but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed.

It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary.

"That's not my age; it's just not true.

My heart is young; the time just flew.

I'm staring at this strange old face, and someone else is in my space."

Yo mama so old, she was there when Moses was born.

Borthwick's hairline.

Hey, guess what I got for my birthday.

No, what did you get? Older.

Is it weird that a milk carton has a date, and I don’t?