Aed jokes

What kind of ankle are you? A broken ankle.

A man once sued smart water for not making him smart. Then a woman replied, “Okay cool, now I’m going to go sue Thin Mints for not making me thin.”

Why can't Columbus be offered a professional football team?

Because then Cincinnati would want one too.

Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁

I was always told as a kid that I have to pick between being a programmer and an English teacher.

They said: you can't be a "pro-grammer nazi."

Puns about air conditioning. I'm not a fan.

We have some leak in the fridge. I'm surprised nobody has called a plumber.

What's the definition of a bastard?

Answer: A man with a 1 inch dick and a 10 inch tongue and all he wants to do is fuck!

What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine?

Unlike the porcupine, the pricks are on the inside.

What does "bitch" mean?

Son asked father, father said it means "you're handsome." Son said, "OK, you're a bitch." Father: "Of course not, I'm not a bitch!"

What do you call a sexually attracted pizza who spoons another pizza?

A Topping.

What did one tree say to another in a crisis? Don't leaf me when things get bad.

How did the coke seller react when someone told him a joke?

He CRACKed up.

A twelve-volt battery walks into a tavern and orders a drink. The bartender serves him, and comments, "Now don't start anything."

A man was taking a child into a dark forest.

The child said, "I'm scared!"

The man replied, "Well I have to walk home alone."

What food makes you smart? Salt, because it's a mined food.

You know what pun is used for "waist?"

Nothing. You'll find nothing.

It's just a waste of time.

What's a boxer's favorite drink? A punch. 🥤🥤

So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.

What happens when an alien connects with your device?

The alien says on your device: ".-- . / - .-. .- ...- . .-.. / ..-. .-. --- -- / -- .- -. -.-- / -- .- -. -.-- / --. .- .-.. .- -..- -.-- ..."