Aed jokes
I tried to find a camouflage shirt, but I couldn’t find one.
I drank some dye before, but don't worry, I've only dyed a little inside.
Q. You know what really bugs me?
A. Insect puns.
What does a stick say when it falls down? "Wood you help me up?"
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
Did Mary Have a Little Lamb?
One day, I put a lady taffy on my ass.
A puma was making another puma laugh. That puma that was laughing said, “Stop making me laugh! I’m gonna puma pants!”
I knew this one guy who liked to swim with the fishes, then the mob got a hold of 'em...
How many people does it take to change a lightbulb underwater? The results are shocking!
What is the most unrealistic thing about Harry Potter?
A ginger with friends.
What do you call a lesbian pirate?
Red Beard.
How does a blind person wipe their ass?
With braille toilet paper.
Lynx Africa is based on a nice smell. Do you think Lynx England would smell like Stella and disappointment?
A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
That awkward moment when a fat kid says, “That’s how I roll.”
What do you call a group of emos?
Suicide Squad.
What's a little white dot on a priest's dick? A baby tooth.
What's the difference between a sidewalk, a drug dealer, and a prostitute?
A: A sidewalk's crack doesn't leave an odor!
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user? A Drive-Thru.
What do you call a U.S. border hopper?
A Mexican jumping bean.