Aed jokes
Why can't Asian people use a telephone?
Because they might wing the wrong number.
What do you call a fudge packer who has special needs?
A gay black male that has Down Syndrome.
What do you call a bowling ball that falls from the sky and knocks down all the bowling pins?
An airstrike.
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
A few days after her husband’s death, a widow accidentally receives an email from a man waiting for his wife in Spain.
The email reads: "Dearest Wife, just got checked in. Everything [is] prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P. S. It’s really hot down here!"
What do your girlfriend and a pool have in common? They both cost a lot of money for the amount of time you’re inside them.
If anyone ever makes a time machine, please make a bunker for Hitler/the Nazis and send them to 2050. I want to see who would die first, future us or them.
What do you call a blank piece of paper?
Women's rights.
My girlfriend left a note on the TV saying, "This isn't working!" I don't know what she's talking about, the TV works perfectly fine.
My arm has a different texture than the rest of me, lol.
What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Holocaust victim?
Harry made it out of the chamber.
Your hairline sucks; even Harry Potter could not put it under a spell to turn it back to order.
How did the pornstar cut herself while using a drill?
She was too used to grabbing the tip.
What is an orphan's favorite toy?
Answer: A boomerang, because it is the only thing that comes back to them.
Q: What did the terrorist say during a plane flight? A: “Wow! This flight is the bomb!”
Yoo! I found a $100 bill, found a child who said they lost their $100 bill. Gave them $25.
When God gives you glory, you give it back.
Why do orphans get confused about ancient Egypt? Because they wouldn’t know what a mummy is.
Yo mama is so stupid, she thought Instagram was a weed delivery service.
A funny joke:
Knock knock. "Who's there?" Who. "Who who?" Ha, who who, you sound like an owl! "Fuck you!"
Do you work at Subway? Because you turn my 6 inch into a footlong.