Aed jokes
Are you made of Gallium and Yttrium?
Because you are looking a little bit GaY.
I drove through a school zone and found out you can drag a speed bump 😬.
I went home to my girlfriend with milk! She said, "Oh thank you honey!"
Then I got a call from a girl named Melissa. She called and said, "Steven, where the hell have you been? It's been two weeks and you still haven't come back yet?"
A guy was dying after getting stabbed in a church. He said to the priest, "Please say a prayer for me," and the priest said, "I ain’t got nun left." Then he died.
One day in Roblox, someone was arguing with me, and they asked me my age. "18." They said that they were twenty-two.
Me: "If you're so smart, what's the largest daycare game on Roblox?"
Him: "Yo Hair," he said. Then he left the game, and I said, "That is so messed up. Actually, that's bullcrap."
Why does this always happen to me...
1+1=3
If you don't use a condom.
Hey, 2nd Amendmenters! Wanna know what gun Jesus used during his time?
What?
A nail gun!
Where did Josh go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.
How do you know if a chick is too fat?
If you pull her pants down, her ass is still in them.
What do you get when you dip a duck in blue paint?
A very pissed duck.
When the teacher gives me an F on my exam,
but I have an AK-47 in my backpack.
*Is honestly the best policy.*
I took a special needs child to a shooting range.
Poor bastard had no idea which direction to run in.
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
What's black and white and read all over?
A newspaper.
What's black, white, black, white, red, white, black, red, black, then red all over?
A penguin falling down the stairs.
What's the difference between a refrigerator and a gay person...
It don't moan when u put milk inside.
What is the difference between an orphan and a cat?
The cat is actually cute.
Can we have sex, because if we don't, I can't like you, big, thick booty!
So let's have sex in bed, you sexy woman, or behind a tree, because shoving my dick in your pussy is a very nice feeling while sucking your ass.
Chuck Norris can toss Jupiter at the Sun with his bare hands.
And he still cannot win a fighting match against Bruce Lee.
What is a group of singing terrorists called? A Taliband.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.