Aed jokes

In America, you work on a plantation.

In Soviet Russia, the plantation works on you!

Why do bugs hate the internet?

Because they always get caught.

Get it? Inter-net?

Which planet would I consider dating?

I don’t know, but not Saturn because she’s already got a ring on her.

I started crying when dad was cutting onions.

Onions was such a good dog.

Where did Joe go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.

I'd make a joke about corn, but it's too corny.

Then again, I could make a joke about eyes, but that would be even cornea. My funny bone is broken. I guess it was because those jokes were too humerus.

One time, Little Johnny heard his parents "wrestling" in their bed. So the next morning, he went to rape all the little girls in school. This then led to his demise.

No girls told on him, but when he grew up, he was a raper. He never stopped. In total, "little" Johnny had over 31 sons that he didn't know about. When he was sentenced to jail, he raped all the inmates despite his small figure. He was then sent to the death sentence, "eagle wing" torture style.

His parents were happy he died, and the morbid rapist was put down, never to return again. However, all the sons had his genes, including his MINDSET. They then became a cult and shot down 2014 cops, 471 military members and 72951 males and females. The kids, you ask? Only the males were spared, and taught how to operate the guns. All but 419 females were killed. They soon became the world's strongest empire. No one could stop Little Johnny's sons. NO ONE.

I watched a potato farmer get arrested the other day.

She kept yelling, "Do you know who I yam?"

I was wearing a George Floyd t-shirt, and a person said to me: "That must be a bit tight round the neck."

I heard the Kardashians were going on a cruise soon.

As if there's not already enough plastic in the ocean.

How do u catch a tame rabbit?

The tame way.

Two guys are on the playground. One guy says to the other, "Did you know that Hellen Keller had a playground in her backyard?" The other guy said, "No." The first guy says, "Neither did she."

I wrote a book called "Endless Love."

It’s about a tennis match between Stevie Wonder and Hellen Keller.

Master has given Dobby a Glock. Dobby is Thug.

What can fly underwater?

A mosquito in a submarine.

Amanda Bynes is a lush blond who has quickly become a blond lush.

You're built like a double cheeseburger.

Yo mama so stupid, she spoke into a letter for voicemail.

Almost all of you suck. If you're following me, hah, this isn't a joke, but it gave my profile a 1 thingy heheh. KYS, Wade =D

A boy walks into the bedroom and sees mom and dad having sex. The boy says, "What are you doing?"

"Baking a cake."

The next day he walked up to his mom doing dishes.

"Remember when you were making a cake? I LICKED UP ALL THE FROSTING."