Aed jokes
Imagine being such a low life that you need people to roast you to have stuff to do.
Your mum sat on a phone, and she turned it into a pancake.
What's the difference between a yellow line and a baby?
You can't run over a yellow line.
Don't make fun of fat people. They already have a lot on their plate.
Q. What makes music on your hair?
A. A headband!
Do you know what's the difference between a knife and a girl's argument?
A knife has a point.
What sea creature can add up? A octoplus.
Yo mama so fat, she uses a mattress as a diaper.
Are you my pantry? Because you look like a snack ;)
What would be a good job for a fat person? A four-chin teller!
So, I met a boy, and he said he would be happy to be a cannibal because if we all were, we could stop overpopulation and world hunger. And I was like 😍😍😍😍🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯
What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.
Why can't a T-Rex clap?
He's dead.
Me and my grandpa went on a road trip, and he died. That was the last thing we did together, and I will never forget his last words: “WAKE UP YOU DUMBASS!”
When God created women, it was an accident. He meant to make a man, but then "WHOA-MAN!!"
A Russian walked into a bar... unlucky for him, in Soviet Russia, you don’t walk into bars. Bars walk into you.
What did the policeman say to his belly button?
You're under a vest.
Mom: You need to grow up. You're so immature.
Me: *glares* Get out of my castle....
Mom: It's a pillow fort.
Me: Why can't I have an imagination! ?
Mom: You're almost 19 years old.
Me: Not good enough... OUT!
When I was a child, I was made to walk the plank... We couldn't afford a dog.
I went to a stand up show with the person who made my life a joke.