Aed jokes
How come I have a father but not a dad?
He was a priest.
Yo mama is so stupid, because when she gave birth to you, she asked for a receipt!
Your birth certificate is a complaint to the condom factory.
There was once a man from Peru. Who fell asleep in a canoe. While dreaming of Venus, He played with his penis, And awoke with a hand full of goo.
Can you make me a bowl of cereal? Oh wait, your dad never came back with the milk.
Friend: Wanna hear a joke?
Other Friend: Sure.
Friend: Pussy.
Other Friend: I don't get it.
Friend: And you never will.
What can you give a white person that you can't give to a black person?
A black eye.
Can you drive a pizza? Of course, as long as you change the olive oil.
Wait, isn't this Sans' job to make a joke?
What’s a bird’s favorite movie?
The Parrots of the Caribbean.
Why does it take three women with PMS to screw in a lightbulb?
IT JUST DOES!!!!
Here is a jacket for my favorite Jew.
It says, "271032."
I moved so much stone today.
I feel like a guy from Palestine looking for his wife.
How do you cure a ginger?
Chemotherapy.
You want to hear a rape joke? Yeah. Damn you ruined it.
What do you call a black person with a pride flag? A Cosmic Brownie.
When an asteroid is coming to kill us all:
98.9% of the population: OMG, we're all gonna die!
1% of the population: Eh... I never had any friends anyway.
Alia: ROLL THE INTRO!
What do you call a letter using the bathroom?
The P.
How many line cooks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Three. One to do it, and two to say that they did it better at the previous restaurant they were at.
When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.