Aed jokes
What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs, and no balls?
Still no fucking idea.
A guy in a wheelchair said, "I stand for Boris." But I think he meant he sat for Boris.
A science teacher got on the Space Shuttle Challenger after winning a contest out of 11,000 other teachers.
Imagine being one of the losing teachers in that contest, watching the Space Shuttle Challenger, and thinking, "Talking about dodging a bullet!"
Why can an orphan relate to a pack of bananas?
Because they both split away from their family.
My wife told me to pass her some chapstick, but then I realized she hasn’t talked to me in a month, then remembering I gave her super glue.........ehh I’m done with her big ass mouth.
What is the difference between a horse and a rabbit?
A horse can't hoop.
What do you call a gay man that is not a vegetarian?
A cocksucker.
Women have so much evil in their blood that God has to drain it once a month. Hehehehehe
A man walked into a bar with an AK-47 with a 50-round mag and yelled out, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" Everyone was quiet.
One man at the back stood up and called, "Sorry mate, but I don't think you have enough bullets."
What do you feed a group of octopuses for dessert?
Octopie!
Your mom is so fat, they asked if she was a sumo wrestler.
What does a Russian do for entertainment?
A nuclear world fair.
Roses are red, I am very cool, You, on the other hand, Need to drown yourself in a pool.
The Queen: "I've had a few medical problems this year. I'm so old that my pussy is haunted!"
Kobe played I Spy and he said, "I spy a mountain."
If you ever get chased by a police dog, try not to go through a tunnel, then on to a little seesaw, then jump through a hoop of fire.
They're trained for that.
What do you call it when you light a person in a wheelchair on fire?
Cooking the vegetables.
What's the difference between a dick and a rock?
One's hard.
Why did the dumb blonde take a shower outside of the house while it was raining?
Because the dumb blonde did not pay the water bill!
"-JuicyFruitSnacks- A whole lot of pepper and a whole lot of salt. If I blame it on my friends, it won't be my fault."
-Mully- This is my mom left!!