Aed jokes
Today there was a line to punch me.
Yeah, that was the punch line.
I was at the park the other day and sat down on the bench next to a mum and her daughter, and she asked which one was my kid, and I said I haven't decided yet.
What type of jokes do you tell an orphan?
Family jokes.
Girl, you must be a Muslim because you are da bomb.
What did Osama have?
Two Boeings and a dream.
What do you get when you cross a Jamaican with a ginger?
A gingerbread man.
I sat down and reminisced about the past. I remembered all the people I've lost along the way.
Maybe becoming a tour guide wasn't a good idea.
What do you call a helicopter, elephant, and rhino?
Hellephino (Hell if I know)
Gently throw a baby off a ten story building!
You look like a cow went through puberty, put the milk before the cereal, then ate it with a fork with a little sprinkle of steak.
Why can't you do a Math test in the zoo?
Because there are too many Cheetahs!
I shidded out my baby, then became a fish.
What is it called when the gynecologist slanders your grandfather?
A pap smear.
Your mama is so fat, when her husband said, "Let's go to the Super Bowl," she bought a spoon.
What does a dick and an elderly person have in common? They are both short.
Q: What do you call a dog that stepped in its own shit?
A: I don't know.
Q: What do you call a zombie with no mouth?
A: Useless.
What's the difference between a human and a potato? There is none, you can eat both.
Grandma: When we go to a wedding, whispers, "You're next."
At a funeral, I whisper, "You're next."
What do you call a dark, average height Punjabi male?
Josiah.