Aed jokes

What do you call a flying bus?

An Airbus.

Where do you go when food dies?

A fooderal.

Yo mama so fat, she needs 500,000 calories a day to keep her fueled.

Even though you are a meateater, you can still totally be a vegetarian.

Dracula was invited to a BBQ. He got stake.

What did the elephant say to the naked man?

"It's nice, but can it pick up peanuts?"

What happens when you cross a pig and karate?

A pork chop!

I was going to make a 9/11 joke, but I'm afraid it will crash and burn.

I would tell you a cat pun, but it's too purr-fect to share.

What happens if you sit under a cow?

You get a pat on the head.

I fucked a chick named Macy, but she had dyslexia.

So I ended up doing the YMCA.

If a sped is late for class, is it wrong to call them tardy?

History teacher: "They had a temporary cure for the disease, but it would be years before they found a cure for life."

Student: "I need that."

I walked up to 2 people kissing and stared.

After a little while, they asked me if I minded. I said no, I don’t mind.

Someone asked me if I was a good sleeper. I told them I'm so good that I can do it with my eyes closed.

I went to a muffler party... it was exhausting!

What does a doctor do to make you better?

Helium.

Wanna hear a skeleton joke?

Sorry, I don't have the guts to tell it.

Stephen is lucky he doesn’t need a vibrator.

He’s got himself.

I ate some gunpowder once. It was an exploding experience.