Aed jokes
Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password.
Me: Sorry mate, it's so short, get a longer one! 🤣
What is black and white and red all over?
Answer: A newspaper.
That is what my 3-year-old told me.
A morbid joke would be what's going on in my mind.
1. What do you call cheese that's not yours? Nacho cheese.
2. Knock, knock. Who's there? Ash. Ash who? Achoo!
3. How does the ocean say hello? He waves.
4. Why can't Elsa have a balloon? Because she will let it go.
5. What do you call your enemy? You don't call it at all.
I love to have sex. And my name is Lex. Which one should I be with next? I really hate my ex. I just saw a huge T Rex, And I think you probably saw this text.
Welcome for the rhyme.
Kiss a girl on the forehead make her happy for a day.
If you give her anal you'll make her whole weak.
Producer: We need to stop testing out products on animals.
CEO: Shampoo companies do it all the time.
Fairchild Republic making the A-10 Thunder Bolt.
I need a new butt. This one has a hole in it.
A disabled man stands up.
A blind man says, "You can stand?"
A deaf man says, "You can see?"
A mute person says, "You can hear?"
The disabled man says, "You can talk!"
Doctor: "What the actual f**k"
Do you know what you call a bunch of depressed kids?
"Suicide Squad!"
What is an orphan's favorite store? Home Depot.
Q: Why is the graveyard so noisy? A: Because all the coffin.
If you don't get it, it means because of people coughing.
Why can't Tottenham open a restaurant? Because they have no silverware.
Yo mama so fat, they had to give her a license plate.
I had the WORST day ever. My ex was sent to the hospital from a gun, and I got my hunting license removed.
I would tell you a joke about 9/11, but it would come crashing down on you.
I never knew what my dad's job was.
One day, at school, I got a scam phone call, later, I got another, and another. I finally had enough and answered the phone, but to make an impact I said "Hello?"
My dad answered...
Why can orphans only use Samsung?
Because they don't have a home button.
I tell a man, "Get me a Glock 19." He comes back with a glove. I was about to shout at him, but then I saw a pistol in his pocket, so I left and thanked him.
What do you call an Indian man stuck in a tree?
A leaf.