Aed jokes
Why are there no pharmacies in Africa?
Because you can't have medicine on an empty stomach.
What can you do if you can't bear sharing the same blood as your father who raped you?
Have a blood transfusion.
All terrorists like starting a new year off with a bang.
Shout out to the terrorists, your year is starting off with a bang!
They say give a man an inch, he'll take a mile. What about women? They don't have dicks.
Man: How tall is a penguin?
Bartender: About three foot, why?
Man: Oh shit, the Bible-bashing nuns! I fucking hit one!
Poor car.
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words:
"You need to park a little closer."
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
God, you’re having a good day?
Me: Yes, beats burning in hell.
I asked the Titanic an icebreaker question.
It couldn't answer.
What do you call two black lads in gold?
A Twix.
Q: I like elephants.
A: Everything else is irrelevant.
Q: I like elephants.
A: Everything else is irrelephant.
Why can't an orphan get 5 stars in GTA? Because they are not wanted.
What do you call a Muslim bee?
Habibee.
All those people claiming Donald Trump is like Hitler need a reality check.
After all, it's not like Donald Trump could write a book.
Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.
"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.
What's brown and in a baby's diaper?
Michael Jackson's hand.
There's a new Michael Jackson biopic in the works. There is a possibility that we will know who his love interest was.
What we know so far: Billie Jean is not his lover, and that kid [seen with him] is not his son. We also know that Michael Jackson said that sharing his bed with little boys is "healing" and an act of "sharing the love," so take that as you will.
Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D