Aed jokes
Daughter: So, I got my period.
Mom: That's wonderful, dear! Now you can bleed for a whole week a month without dying!
Daughter: That's nice, Mum, but isn't the whole point of getting your period dying?
Mom: Yes, but you have to kill yourself a little longer to live through to another day.
Daughter: Thanks, Mum. That makes a whole lot of sense. (Sarcastically.)
Mom: You're welcome, honey. (Clueless, obviously.)
True Story of Little Red Riding Hood.
The big bad wolf told Red Riding Hood to strip. He looked at her pussy and said, "Now I will fuck you!"
Red pulled out a shotgun from under her coat and said, "Oh no you're not. You're not, you're going to eat me just like it says in the book!"
What’s the difference between your mum and your nan?
Your nan's a GILF!
Why did ItsFunneh go on the road? She so Draco looking at a car then the car runs over him, sad Draco.
Me and my friend's life story on a daily basis.
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
I would post a joke, but maybe it's too deadpan.
How many black people does it take to start a protest? -1.
What do you call it when a friend calms his suicidal friend? "Hang in there, buddy."
What do you call a pillow that has been on the bed for 20 years in jail?
A criminal! 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
A man was asked by his 21 years old daughter, "Dad, how do you give a blowjob to a man that has a big dick?"
Her father replied, "Honey, you should have watched me last night. It was inside my mouth. Does it cycle now?"
I have the best life coach ever, because he taught me to not care. He did it so well that he died last week, and I still don’t care.
You are walking through the woods when you cross a woman who has been raped and beheaded. What is the first thing you do?
Check your map, you’re obviously going in circles.
Your mom's like a candy machine; she pops out for anybody.
When you realize the person reading this is a clown.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfi.
I was talking to a Muslim yesterday, and he asked me what it's like to be blind.
I happened to tell him about 20 jokes; in fact, I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with, "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It's not like I need the damn things anyway."
I did a bungee jump for charity recently. It was called "spastics on elastics."
Why did lil Timmy drop his lollies?
He was hit by a train.
What's the difference between my basement and my garage?
One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.