You're jokes

Son, why do I not have an Easter basket?

Mom, you're 23, you don't need one. Ends calls, child support.

Friend: You're adopted.

Orphan: At least I was chosen!

Friend: At least I was kept.

911 help. Hello?

Never mind, forget it. You're so stupid 😡😡😡😡😏

You're so fat that when you were born, the nurse mistook you for the father.

A man's daughter comes home from school and asks her dad if she can borrow the car.

The father replies, "No, it's too late at night."

The daughter says, "C'mon, Dad. I'll do anything."

The dad says, "OK, suck my dick."

The daughter says, "No, that's disgusting."

The dad says, "You want the car. You said you'll do anything."

The daughter agrees. Just as she is about to put her father's dick into her mouth, she stops and says, "Eww, Dad, your dick smells like shit."

The dad replies, "Yeah, well, your brother borrowed the car about an hour ago."

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your mom gay, And so are you.

Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.

Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.

An orphan comes up to me and says, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."

How do you turn a cat into a fish?

Tell your girl not to wash down there.

Your mom is so fat, that burger.

I hate it when you say your life is a joke because a joke actually has meaning.

Pilot: So Kobe, it seems like you’re not going to make it to your destination in time, so I’m going to put it on autopilot so I can find a place to fill with gas.

Kobe: Take us to the side of that mountain at full speed. I don’t really want to go to the event anymore.

Your mama is so fat. When she went skydiving, it caused a global panic.

Keep rolling your eyes and maybe you'll find a brain back there.

Me: What's the fifth month of the year?

Friend: May.

Me: May deez nuts fit in your mouth?

Your mama is so fat.

She went on a diet and solved world hunger!

Did you know that if you die you can still be a part of family game night!

All you have to do is have your family cremate you and put you in an hour glass, and the games that use hour glasses, well, you will be a part of family game night.

My name is Mr. Cheese, but your jokes are still cheesier than me...

Your mom's ass is so petite and big, I'd pound that till the Earth shakes.

A man sees a girl crying and asks her what's wrong.

The girl replied, "Everyone keeps making fun of me."

"You should tell your parents," I replied back.

The girl started crying even more. That's when I got confused and left the orphanage.