You're jokes
When should you discourage your husband from exercising and dieting? When he wants to fit in your clothes!
Your hairline go so far back it remember the Civil War, ugly ahh.
I have no problem with prostitution.
It's like an Air BnB for your dick.
Job interview: "What's your greatest weakness?"
"Honesty."
"I don't think honesty is a weakness."
"I don't give a fuck what you think."
How can you tell if your husband is dead?
The sex is the same, but you get to use the remote.
Memes
Your hairline is so far gone that you could build a runway.
Your mom has quite the mouth on her.
As I found out last night. Oh, what a night!! 😏 😉 😜
My grandad and your hairline go way back.
Your hairline's so ugly, it turned Medusa to stone!
The farmers were playing chess, and the winner shouted and said: "I killed your horse!"
The second quickly left, and when he returned he said: "We have poisoned all your cows!"
If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.
Your mom's so poor, she chased the garbage truck with her grocery list.
If you text your crush and they leave you on read, just know that "read" has four letters. You know what also has four letters? "Mine." So that basically means that you are theirs. :)
Why did Hellen Keller's dogs run away?
Because wouldn't you runway too if your name was djhdhekdndyekedhekekfjkfurir?
At one point in your life, you were exactly pi years old.
Dating in your 30s is like looking for a parking spot...
The good ones are all taken. The rest are either handicapped or too far away.
How do you make your girlfriend scream during sex?
Call and tell her about it.
Bro, is your hairline and your forehead good friends because they go way back?
"Hey Kels, what's on your arm?"
"Oh, that was the cat."
"We don't have a cat..."
"Oh..."
Your hair line is curved like a moving train.