You're jokes

You're so poor, you only got 2 jokes.

TV Darth Vader: "I'm your father!"

Orphans: "Yea."

Your mom.

If your dad said, "Take out the trash," he means to take you out.

Well, we've removed all of the excess fat from your body, and all that's left, I'm afraid, is the wig, Mrs. Trump.

A failed marriage is like an Avengers movie.

First someone snaps, then half your stuff is gone.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Tank." "Tank who?" "You're welcome!"

When your wife takes 30 minutes to get ready.

Me: Takes five minutes.

Me: Hun, you done yet?

Your wife dumped you because you are so poor and you are so ugly. You also live under a rock and have no money. You got dumped so hard you can't remember you got dumped.

When you were late to school and your teacher called you tardy, she meant that in more ways than one.

I’m not religious, but you’re the answer to all of my prayers.

Mom: Daddy, stop!

Me: No!

Mom: Ok, I just wanted you to do it like your father.

When you see someone with a double chin that’s sad:

Hey come on, man, keep your chin up. Wait, which one?

"Never gonna give, never gonna give (Give you up) We've known each other for so long Your heart's been aching, but You're too shy to say it Inside, we both know what's been going on We know the game and we're gonna play it I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you Never gonna make you cry Never gonna say goodbye Never gonna tell a lie and hurt you." mucho_mango: just woke up from my dream what was that.

Alright, so I have a few orphan jokes. I'm gonna put them all in one message.

Why can't orphans be gay? They have no one to call "daddy."

Why can't orphans go on a field trip? Parent signature: ______

New teacher: I used to be an orphan as a kid. Students: hahaha Teacher: Is anyone missing? Students: No one, just your parents.

Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They kept calling everyone "daddy."

Why do orphans have the iPhoneX? Because it has no home button.

What kind of cigarettes does a hippie smoke?

Yours.

Your hairline is so far back that when I wrote it on a chalkboard, it did not erase.

Your hairline is so bad that it turned Wonder Woman into Failure Man.

Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"

Your mom finds a mirror on the scrapyard and says, "I would have thrown away a picture like that, too!"