You jokes

What do you call a bee from America?

A USB.

Bro, they almost forgot you in the abortion bucket.

Doctor: You have cancer.

Patient: Will I survive?

Doctor: Probably not.

How many hookers fit in a Cadillac?

About 4 in the trunk if you stack 'em right.

For me, the best part of depression is remaining charming around strangers but saving the misery for the ones who love you.

You have a head of a Malteser and a hairline VEGTA.

What happens when you fail to be an emo? You don't make the cut.

What do you call a ball with no hair? A Mexican ball.

If you take off the first and last letter of "demon," they're gonna turn emo.

Hi, welcome to June's Orphanage. You make them, we bake them. How can I help you?

I saw you when I got chance at the adoption center!

Alex: Dad, can we get me a little brother from the orphanage?

Dad: Sure, Alex!

Dad: We're here!

Orphanage manager: Alex! You are so big now!

Alex: Dad, what is she talking about?!

Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure?"

That's a horrible thing to find out when you're adopted.

This is not a joke, Tom. I'm asking you to leave me alone, stop being sexual, I don't like you.

What do you call an idiot?

An absolute imbecile.

Are you free tomorrow?

No, I’m expensive, sorry. 💵💸

That shit was trash. You can't handle me.

Hold up. Aren't you Nathaniel B.?

Roses are red, violets are blue, when I saw you I thought you can mix too.

What do you call a squad of emo kids?

Suicide Squad.

Are you a noose, 'cause I wanna hang out with you?