You jokes
What do you call a fast boat?
Usain Boat.
Do you wanna eat makeup, 'cause you're not pretty on the inside?
Freddy: I'm coming for you >:)
Me: God, no, help!
*game notification pops up with very loud sound*
You got no lotion to masturbate, then you remember there's some leftover porridge in the fridge. 😌🤎😇
What do you call a fat downie?
A couch potato.
What do you call an LGBTQ person getting grilled? LGBBQ.
Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"
Me: "Nun."
I hate it when I go to the shop and people are like, "Oh, hey what are you doing here?"
Me: "Oh, you know, just hunting elephants."
Teacher: "Do you guys want to get in trouble?"
Kid named Teacher: *
What do you call someone without a body and a nose? Nobody knows.
Are you a horse, because I want to ride you?
Is it classed as down under if you eat out an Australian chick?
What do you call a blind person driving a car?
Died.
What do you call Jan[uary] 6th?
White people smearing shit on the walls of the capitol!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thank God I'm not as ugly as you.
You look like the type of guy to wash his/her hands after a shower! (And don't write in the comments that there are more than 2 genders.)
If your parachute doesn't work, don't worry.
You have the rest of your life to figure it out.
What's the difference between a piano, a pot of glue, and a tuna fish?
You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.
What about the glue?
I knew you'd get stuck there.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Tell him to clap until his parents come home.
You say Alex Jones, I say Alex moans mmmmm. I like that fat, tasty big boy and his Rolex watches, mummy, he turns me on!