You jokes
What do you call a communist pirate ship?
The USS Arrrrr.
Have you heard about the pedophile who was guilty of robbery?
He took a girl's innocence.
What starts with F and ends with uck? Firetruck, what were you thinking?
How do you know that the U.S. sucks at chess?
They lost two towers.
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking Fanta make you fantastic?
Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question.
Johnny: What?
Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty?
Johnny: Yes ofc jesus made everybody wonderfully!
Ex: Awhh!
Johnny: But whoever made you was painting Thomas the Train while making your face.
What do you call a high school student?
Alone and depressed.
What is hell to you?
Jesus!!!!!
He is everywhere taking our time and energy and our lives for his entertainment.
But Judgment Day is his eternal hell!
And our Eternal Heaven!!
What do you call a family photo taken by an orphan?
A selfie.
What do you call a white kid at the back of the class?
School shooter.
what do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
a family photo.
Disabled man stands up.
Blind man: “You can stand?”
Deaf man: “You can see?”
Mute man: “You can hear?”
Disabled man: “You can talk?”
Doctor: “What the actual fuck?”
Other doctor: “FUCK THIS, I QUIT!”
What do you call a pissed off midget?
A micro-aggression.
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
A drunk man walked out of a bar and kept falling flat on his face. He wondered why this was until his wife spoke to him:
Wife: "Why is your face all bloody?"
Husband: "I was so drunk that I couldn't stand up, so I kept falling on my face!"
Wife: "Idiot. You left your wheelchair at the bar!"
What do you call the day before Christmas Eve? Christmas Adam.
What do you call a boy in your mom?
Your dad.
One like = more from me to you. 👊
Are you Hiroshima? Because I want to drop my bomb inside you.
You take a plane from Australia. Your mom is American, your dad is British, and your brother (and you) is Canadian (well, because they traveled along many places). You are eating dinner, but you realized you were going to Europe.
You went sleepy, and you forgot your pet named "Strallia." But she could not go anyways, so you had to leave her. When you went to Europe, you were in the "COUNTRY-SIDE."