You jokes
If cancer was a person I’d shake their hand and say: "Thank you for your service."
Sorry if it’s too far, but don’t come here if you can’t take it.
Ever heard the saying white people can’t jump??
Well, I think that’s total bullshit. You should have seen us on 9/11!
What do you call a bunch of microcephalics in a swimming pool?
Vegetable soup.
I am the least serious person ever, but whoever is joking about cancer is vile :)
Get some fucking respect, you silly tramp!
What do you call a modern-day plague doctor? A COVID doctor.
What do you call a bird with no wings?
Answer: A FLAP.
What do gum and guns have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend all of a sudden.
What do you get when you combine a planet and an apple?
Mario.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
A man walks in to the doctor.
He says, "Doctor, I need a new butt. Mine has a crack in it."
Doctor: How many times do I have to tell you!!!
What do you call a bunch of wheelchairs on top of one another?
A vegetable rack.
Do you like fish sticks?
If you do, you're a gay fish.
You guys have very baaaaaaa-d puns!
Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.
Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?
Me: Aren't you my son?
Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.
What do you do when your sister asks you “Why are you sad?”
Reply back with “Because you were born.”
What do you call Link when he is hurt?
A link to the cast.
Q: How do you make a fire?
A: Oil and dead babies.
How do you fit a whale inside a car? A blender.
What did the man say to the girl?
You just milked a cow.
Why are there no women in the NFL?
Commissioner Roger Goodell firmly believes in equal opportunity, so the girl tries out. Then, if she makes the team, we gangbang her to death. I mean, could you imagine what a scary birch she'd have to be?