I remember my mom's last words before her divorce, "Did you just load in me?"
You Jokes
A blind guy and his seeing eye dog walk into a bar.
The blind guy starts swinging the dog around on the leash.
The bartender yells, "Sir, stop! What are you doing!?"
The blind guy says, "I'm just looking around."
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your way into someone's pants.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
No, neither has he.
I would tell you a joke about pizza,
but it's too cheesy.
You were tricked, loser. ;]
What do you call an Indian person who is not starving? Dead.
You know the sport that Mexicans are good at?
Cross-country.
My "overweight" friend and I were talking at lunch.
Overweight friend: Man, why you so ugly, dude?
Me: *annoyed* Jason, when you stepped on the scale this morning, it asked for your weight, not your phone number.
The moment when you tell an illegal immigrant to go home and he walks to the jail cell and closes it.
If you're reading this right now, Then the joke's on you, Because I'm right behind ya, mothafucka!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I'm laughing because you look like a monkey.
No, seriously,
I'm right behind ya.
Science flies you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
How do you find a redneck virgin?
Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.
What do you get if you cross a pig and a witch with sand?
A ham sandwich.
He died because of a fuck up by the Hospital. Apparently, the doctor said to the nurse, "You can discharge Mr. Hawking now," so she went to his room and pulled the plug out of his computer.
If you have sex and your African parents find out,
“You can do the boom boom. But you can not do the boom boom in my house. Do it somewhere else."
The last number of your like is the Amogus you get.
1: Amogus trollface
2: Frogus
3: Amogus in 2013
4: Chogus
5: Classic Amogus
6: Wait this isn't Amogus
7: Amogus drip
8: Amog sus
9: Amog stuff
Lol, I switched out my friend's leukemia medication for mercury.
Like and comment if you get it!
How do you turn a straight guy into a gay guy? Well... for starters, you grab that ass of his, drag him into the bathroom, and tell him to suck my long, big pineapple, and thus you have yourself one straight guy converted into a dick-sucking machine.
If a person in a wheelchair runs you over, can you call it a "hit and can't run?"
