You jokes
Do you want to hear a paper joke?
Never mind, it is tearable.
What do you call a ride that drops 180 degrees?
Cold as hell.
What do you call purple when it's being mean? Violent.
Me: That’s a good WAVE.
Friend: I SEA it.
Wave: Doesn't break for us to surf on.
Me: I was SHORE it would be good.
Friend: I SEA what you did there.
What do you call a burger 🍔 with one eye?
A one giant.
Memes
Hollow Knight Meme
What is your car you cannot drive? A super flying car!
Do you want to hear three jokes?
Joke Joke Joke.
Why are you censoring my friend Franz? He's just making jokes, but you admins get offended too easily, f*cktards!
If you take a cap off a bottle, is it decapitation?
Sorry guys, I tried. I tried harder this time. I'll try again. Sorry, I can't delete things.
What did my dad say before he went to go get milk?
"There's money in my wallet for pizza. I love you."
What do you call a cemetery of dead Arabs? A mine field.
What do you call intelligent people in the U.S.?
Tourists.
You know the stupid trend where people say it’s ok to be overly obese? Healthy even? That you should take pride in it? Which idiots started that movement?
Well. We know one thing for sure. They were obviously members of a wider community.
A kid asks his mom what dark humor is.
She says, “You see that man with no arms, tell him to clap.”
“But mom, I’m blind!” says the kid.
“Exactly,” replied the mom.
What do you call a gay French man?
A faguette!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Your dad.
But my dad's dead.
I know, just reminding you!
Do you know the best thing about killing a hooker?
Not only do you get your money back, but the second hour is free.
I was watching TV with my brother, and a diabetes commercial came on saying, "I have type one diabetes, and I manage it well." My brother said, "You want a sugar cookie?"
It's not rape if you say "April Fools!"
I have to say my humor isn't the best, but I'll give this a go.
My science teacher always reminded us about kilometers per second. Now I want to kilometer per second.
You know those credit card inserters at Walgreens? I want to insert my credit card on my wrist.
I'll shut up now.