You jokes

Are you a knife?

Because I want to deep throat you.

What is the difference between Pikachu and an orphan?

Pikachu, I choose you!

I saw a little boy sitting on a curb wearing rags.

I said: "Aww, are you an orphan?"

And he responded with "Yeah. What gave me away?"

And I said: "Your parents."

What do you call it when a prostitute pays someone 5 bucks to fuck them?

5 dollar footlongs.

Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.

Girl: Dad, where are you?

Dad: I went to go get milk.

Girl: But we have milk.

Dad: I know, I just don't love you.

What do you call a man with no head? Airhead.

House for sale: five minutes from the beach or eight seconds if you fall.

What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire?

Hot wheels.

You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.

Whoever stole my anti-depression medications, I hope you're happy!

You’re so fat; if you go outside now, you’d be arrested for breaking social distancing guidelines.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent.

If you ever get mad at an orphan, punch them in the face... What are they going to do, tell their parents?

What do you call a cow in a moving van?

A: A mooving cow.

It's really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.

Fact: If you jump off a 12-story building, you will not like the result.

"Hi, honey, how do you want buns?"

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?

Because it has a silent “p.”