You jokes
My eggcellent egg yolks crack everyone up.
If you don't like them, you're just hard boiled.
One time my friend nutted into my bag of trail mix.
I guess you could say I fucking ate a different kind of nut.
What do you call a Black Iron Man?
Robert Browny Jr.
What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta.
Why is there no open hunting season on hippies?
Have you ever tried to clean one?
How do you make an elephant float?
One elephant, two scoops of ice cream, and a lot of root beer!
Roses are red, my blood is too, And I've been seeing it a lot more, since I've lost you.
If you want any pictures of cheese for your laptop, I've got enough to Philadelphia.
If you start at a bait shop, you're an amateur baiter, but once you achieve the highest level, you become a master baiter. Now buy a shrimp boat and become a master baiter on a shrimp boat.
I've patched 1,000 roofs, and they don't call you Boris the roof patcher. I've built 100,000 swords and shields, and they don't call you Boris the blacksmith, but you fuck one goat!
What's a chair's favorite snack?
Chair-ies or Cherries if that's how you wanna spell it .3.
Did you hear about the person who died? I would tell you about him, but he died.
You wanna hear a joke? It's YOU.
Let me tell you how I escaped Iraq. Iran! (;)
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lick-alot-a-puss.
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Car-los
There are two cows in a field. One says to the other, "I'm cold. Are you cold?"
The other cow says, "Yeah, I'm Fresian."
Time heals all wounds.
Unless you have AIDS, when time kills you slowly and painfully.
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
What do you call an overweight psychic?
A four chin teller.