You jokes

What is the only part of a vegetable you can’t eat?

The wheelchair.

Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?

Sans: What do you call them?

Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!

Want to know how a joke becomes a dad joke? Just wait for it to leave you and never come back.

Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.

If you don’t get it, a Chinese woman ate a bat and she got the coronavirus (I think).

What do you call an Asian that was born too early?

Wong Tai Ming.

Roses are red, violets are blue, she's only red bc she sucked you.

What do you call a parent that is pregnant?

Buy one, get one free.

My mom gives me your stuff because you have bad grades.

Me: How about my 5 little brothers? I have A's; he has F's.

She lets him play anyway and I don't.

What do you call field day in Africa?

The Hunger Games.

What’s the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator?

The refrigerator won’t fart when you pull the meat out.

Yo mama so stupid, she failed a survey.

Girl: I’m so in love with you!

Boy: Me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot.

Girl: What’s the ijk?

Boy: I’m just kidding.

You know why I only date disabled people? Cause they can't get away.

What do you call a rich Chinese child?

"Ching Ching..."

I asked my mom if I can help her out with the cooking, she answered yes.

A few hours later, dinner was ready and dad came to join. Mother said, "Honey, can you get the mashed potatoes?" Dad said, "Why, she’s right here."

My parents told me that I should go hang with my friends and get out of the house.

So I called some of my friends and told them to meet me in the school yard. One said, "What tree?"

I replied, "You’ll know when you get here!"

My parents never said how they wanted us to hangout.

How do you get a nun pregnant?

Dress her up like an altar boy.

When you see an orphanage bully, remind them that no matter how powerful they are, they will never be as strong as their dads... Oh wait, they don't have a dad.

That shirt's very becoming on you.

If I were on you, I’d be coming too.

What would you throw between a priest and a nun? A bottle of whiskey.