You jokes
What is the worst part about making an Asian girl squirt?
She charges you for extra sauce!
How can you be fast and slow at the same time, getting a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
Motivational quote for today: if you think you're dumb, you're probably overestimating your intellectual abilities...
What do you call a black goldfish? A gigger.
What do you call a Mexican fighting a Catholic priest?
Alien vs. Predator.
Did you hear about the orphan that tried to high five a tree? It left her hanging.
You twin towers because I'm tryna ram in you tonight.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
Jesus was drinking when he made you.
Why can't people in Africa have medicine?
Because you cannot have pills on an empty stomach.
What do you call an orphan family? None existent.
Why do blonde prostitutes prefer blowjobs?
They hate it when you hand it to them.
What do you call a Chinese assassin?
Chinese takeout.
What do you call a fat chick with a rape whistle?
Optimistic.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a good body these days?
I think Jeffrey Dahmer had the right idea, just put it in the freezer.
You also have to learn to say no. For example: “Would you like a piece of cake?” - “No, I would like two.”
What do you get when you mix alcohol with literature?
Tequila Mockingbird.
If your uncle Jack needed help getting off of a horse, would you help your uncle Jack off a horse?
What do you call a tall terrorist?
Osama Bin Laden.
How do you anger a democrat?
Don't tell him the truth.