You jokes
What do you call a rich Chinese man?
Cha-ching!
Well, if someone ever calls you gay 🌈🏳️🌈, just say, "Well, at least I'm straighter than the pole your mommy dances on." 🤣🖕
Stop saying negative shit about dark humor jokes! If it bugs you that bad, then go away! That'll solve everything but world hunger and failed abortion.
What do you call a masturbating cow?
Beef stroganoff.
Little Johnny was walking down an alley and saw a lamp. After he rubbed it, a genie came out and said, "You have 10 seconds to have one wish." Little Johnny says he wants to pee alcohol. The genie grants his wish. He tells his family, and his sister doesn't believe it. After having a drink, she says, "We should have this every night!" Little Johnny gets two cups every night, one for him and his sister. He does the same thing for four nights. Eventually, he ran out of cups and has one left. He gives it to himself, and his sister asks, "Where's my cup?" Little Johnny replied, "You're drinking out of the bottle tonight."
What do you call a blowjob from a girl who has autism?
Special head.
What’s the difference between Jesus and a prostitute?
The look they give you while you’re nailing them.
Doctor: "I'm sorry, but you suffer from a terminal illness and only have 10 to live."
Patient: "What do you mean 10? 10 what? months? weeks?"
Doctor: "9, 8, 7..."
What do you call a black person with a pride flag? A Cosmic Brownie.
What do you call a heterosexual man performing fellatio on another heterosexual man?
Bisexual.
And the Lord said unto John, “Come forth and you will receive eternal life.”
But John came fifth, and he got a toaster.
How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
Poker Face.
What did one needle say to the other?
"You be looking sharp!"
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell them to clap til' their parents get home.
When you're sitting in class and the quiet kid yells, "Lovely day, isn't it?" ... and you see a Glock shape in his pocket.
What do you call a letter using the bathroom?
The P.
What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?
Hot wheels.
How do you cure a ginger?
Chemotherapy.
You want to hear a rape joke? Yeah. Damn you ruined it.
Why can’t you trust an atom?
Because they make up everything.