You jokes
what do you call a rape victim in Ukraine?
Debris.
Did you hear about the tomato and the lettuce race?
Well, the lettuce was ahead, and the tomato was trying to ketchup!
What do you call a racist crow?
Jim.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have five fingers, and the middle one is for you.
"This isn't the first time my husband's cheated on me, but you're my sister! You'd better have a better explanation than this magic lamp."
"You know how you have to be specific making wishes? Well, I was really horny and asked the genie to have the world's biggest penis....ended up with a concert pianist that's seven foot tall. Nice guy. Next time I tried, I asked for the world's biggest cock, that was fun but the poor rooster died. So I asked for the world's biggest dick and that's how I ended up on top of your husband."
Memes
How do you make a cat go "woof"?
... douse it in gasoline and set it on fire! "woof!"
If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.
How do you know you're following a DeLorean? The white line disappears.
A man and a boy are walking into a forest. It begins to get dark. The boy says "Mister, I'm scared." The man replies "How do you think I feel, I have to walk back alone."
What do you call an orphan with a boner?
Porn.
Your dad never needed a van for you.
What do you say when you see a pig making bread?
He's bacon.
I'd love it if you killed yourself, but Hitler killed himself and people still hate him...
When the school shooter asks the autistic kid which hostage he wants to rape, and he looks at you like 😋.
What's the best part of being a pedophile? You will never have a wife.
1. You're so dumb, you think Cheerios are donut seeds!
2. You're so fat, you could sell shade!
3. You're just like coconut water, nobody likes you!
4. Have you been shopping lately? Because they're selling lives around the corner, you should go get one!
If being ugly was a crime, you would get a life sentence!!
Are these good?
What did Mario say when he broke up with Princess Peach?
It's not you, it's a-me, Mario!
What do you call a Mexican in the zombie apocalypse?
Answer: "Sweet and spicy chicken."
What do you do if you're ever attacked by a gang of clowns?
Go for the juggler!
What do you call a rich Chinese man?
Cha-ching!