You jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was running from you, hehe.
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Carlos.
What do you do with a dead chemist?
You Ni-tro-gen!
I say hi to Sans. Sans shows his hand and says, "It's hand to meet you," and we both laugh.
What do you call a pineapple in a pun?
A Puneapple.
What did Gandalf say to Mario? "You shall not pass!"
My boy, I think it is about time that I leave this world. Now draw your weapon and kill me now!
*draws a picture of his "epic" sword*
"What... WHAT... WTH ARE YOU DOING SIMPLETON? I DIDN'T MEAN THAT KIND OF DRAW!"
My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
What do you call a non-binary person that is lactose intolerant?
Non-buy dairy.
What's a benefit of being an orphan?
No one makes yo mama jokes to you.
There are only 2 genders: if you have a dick, or a pussy.
Did you know I'm a really fast reader?
I can go through a few stories in just a few seconds!
How do you know if there's a vegan in the room?
Wait 2 minutes and they'll tell you.
I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away!
Fat chicks be like, "Am I fox pretty, bunny pretty, cat pretty, or deer pretty?" Like none, bitch, you elephant pretty. 😭😭😭
If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.
You call your dad the sun because he is 90 million miles away.
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
Someone: PLEASE EAT! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE!
Me: *Trying to remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because I've already googled it and given up because it takes too long.*
Me: Na, yeah, I still have 19 days left.
What do you call a priest that graduated from law school?
Father-in-law.