Roses are red,
Violets are blue, there's always someone who's better than you.
You Jokes
Roses are red, violets are blue, you have a big forehead, and your hairline recedes too.
What do you call an Australian visiting the UK on holiday?
Returning to the scene of the crime.
What do you call it when a drunk cowgirl falls off her stool at the bar?
A hoedown.
Did you know there are black holes billions of years old?
What’s more amazing is the black holes Stephen Hawking studied. We're only 14 years old.
Expectation: "Brr, I’m cold!" "Here brother! I’ll give you my jacket, I don’t want you to be cold!"
Reality: "Brr, I’m cold!" "Well, damn bro, I can’t control the weather."
Q: Do you know why transgender people are good at being carpenters?
A: Because they have more experience cutting off their wood.
Q: What do you call a pervert with no legs?
A: A creepy crawly.
Friends: "You wanna hang with us?"
Me: "No, I wanna hang myself."
You learn from the best.
Sir, I mustache you a question...
Ah, never mind, I'll just shave it for later.
What do you call a passport for Mandalorians?
A Pre Visa!
Girls are like volcanoes.
You never know when they will erupt.
Me: I look up to you.
Friend: Wow, thanks!
Me: But in general cuz your so tall.
If you ever get mad at a person that crumpled their leg, don't forget that they can hide, but they can't run.
What do you call a midget psychic that has escaped from prison?
A small medium at large.
What do you call an emo kid with light up shoes?
A human chandelier.
Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies if you cook bacon and bake cookies?
I just wanted to say to never let go of family; they are everything. Never let anyone walk all over you. And if you are with me, like this quote.
you play gatcha life more like go get a life.
My sister is pregnant, I'm gonna be a dad.
Yeah, you can call me daddy, son.
