What happens if you put your hand in glue? Your hand will stay there forever! I'm joking, hahaha!
You Jokes
You are so fat you were able to occupy Wall Street all by yourself.
So, there was this kid, and he went to a store and said to a person there, "I'm emo." Then the person told the emo, "Why the hell are you here? Shouldn't you be hanging in a tree somewhere?"
What do you call when an orphan takes a selfie?
A family photo.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Anything you want; it won't chase you.
You're so weak, someone breathed on you and you flew away!
Yo mama so dumb, when I told her my friend was mute she said, “Can't you unmute her?”
Did you hear about the famous pickle?
He was a big dill!
How do you know an abo robbed your house?
The bins (trash cans) are empty and the dog is pregnant.
You are so ugly when you gave birth to your baby, you gave it carpet burn.
What do you call a house that isn't a house?
Not a house.
Friend: Wanna hear a joke?
Orphan Friend: Sure.
Friend: Parents.
Other: I don't get it.
Friend: And you never will.
What do you call an orphan's family photo?
A self-portrait.
You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I am high and so are you.
You were born so fat they needed two cranes to carry you.
I was doing a 10km run with my good friend Pessi. As we were setting up our smart watches, the watch voice asked us if we wanted to do a solo run or a group run.
Pessi proceeded to smash both our watches and shout, “I don’t want solo run, I want Penalty!”
Shame on you, Pessi!
You are a fat pig.
You're so skinny that your mom had to use a whole shampoo bottle on your head, but she still couldn’t find you.
What do you get when you cross between Tailga and emo?
Tailighmo.