How do you help a rape victim on a diet lose 7 pounds?
Kill her afterwards.
You Jokes
9/11 hahahahaha. Lawrence, I hope you read this!
What do you call a car on the side of the road, lit up and ablaze?
Paul Walker's death.
What do you call an orphan you put into a volcano with a wheelchair?
Hot Wheels.
When you see someone, you say, "Go suck bananas."
You're so fat you sunk Captain Crunch's ship.
You're so fat your blood type is Nutella.
What do you get when you mix a white guy and a fire?
A firecracker.
What do you call Josh in a room...
Gay.
What do you call a kid with no home?
A homeless kid.
And together we will make America great again.
You were never great in the first place.
What do you call the middle of a penny?
A center (get it? Cent-er).
Badminton: Your breath is so bad that you have to take a mint before you go on Fortnite.
What do you call a sad porno?
A tear jerker.
Fall coming 🍁 grab you a hoodie & sum1's thick thigh baby mama to keep you warm 😌🍂
Never mind if I told you, it would go straight through your head.
"Beast Boy Four"
Hello. What can I get you? A knife, mustard, Marella, gorilla?
What type of flower do you give an orphan?
A self-raising [flour].
An orphan goes into a bar, and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you need parent permission to enter."
You're so ugly, your mother thought about setting you up for adoption.
I may not be the brightest candle on the cake, but you can still blow me.