Night Stand jokes
What does a one-night stand have in common with earthquakes? You never know how long they'll last.
Whenever I have a one night stand, I always use protection.
A fake name and a fake phone number.
What does a carpenter do after a one night stand?
The second nightstand.
When that one night stand says she has AIDS but you laugh, "I choose D!"
She says...wait what?? I have all of the above! XD
What does the cannibal get after a one night stand?
Breakfast in bed!
Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what's right, with all your might.
The furniture store keeps calling me back... But all I wanted was that one nightstand.
Me: Good night, everyone.
My friends and family: Night.
Me: *gets in coffin*
My family: *stares at my friends* You aren't going to do something?!?
My friends: *to my family* Nope, this is normal.
What is a good night's sleep? I love it when you walk home and walk walk home from school. Was your time I had dinner night night? Dinner night, is it fun for me? I o I had dinner.
There was a man. He came home with his friends from the bar and man was he ever wasted! Their friends made sure to get him home safely. The next morning, he woke up and found blood all over his nightstand. He called his friends and asked for his alarm clock back.
"Monica Lewinsky has gone down on Bill Clinton several times. What's stopping her from having a one-night stand with Donald Trump?"
"Trump is nothing more than a little pussy, don't ya know?"
What does a robot do at the end of a one night stand? -- He nuts and bolts.
Community talk
One Night Stand And I'm Good I've Already Won You Gotta Problem Yes You Do The Kid Has Problems And He Needs Help Your Fantasy Isn't Reality My 8 inch Dick What A Ugly Fat Thot
1. Would you rather have the ability to see 10 minutes into the future or 150 years into the future? 2. Would you rather have telekinesis (the ability to move things with your mind) or telepathy (the ability to read minds)? 3. Would you rather team up with Wonder Woman or Captain Marvel? 4. Would you rather be forced to sing along or dance to every single song you hear? 5. Would you rather find true love today or win… Read more
Lyrics She's more than just a pretty face In a late night bar More than just a pair of tight jeans Sitting in your car She's more than a last call kiss Or a one night stand Remember, boy, you weren't the first to hold her hand She's somebody's daughter She's somebody's everything She's somebody's little girl Even if she's grown up and moved away She's somebody's whole world She's somebody's baby And if you don't trea… Read more