You jokes

You know that I drink water, right? I drink water because I am water. Water is water.

If you enter the bathroom as an American and leave the bathroom as an American, what are you in the bathroom?

A European.

You're homeless, you orphan!

"You get no bitches," said the man to the 60-year-old redneck virgin guy who is obese and balding with "Trump" stuff plastered all over his pickup truck.

Hang in there, ya emo bastards! Remember, you could always be dead. Oh, too soon?

No wonder they wanna die so much. I'd wanna die too if I was a freak who listens to Black Veil Brides!

Anybody got a knife? I mean, an emo dildo?

Q: What do you call a cat living with a vet? A: A dead, shrivelled up cat on her death bed that is attached to their owner.

Isn't It Purrfect!

At an orphan's funeral, you say, "Your dad came back."

1) Did you hear the one about the school shooting? Actually, I better not... You wouldn't understand, it's aimed more towards a younger audience.

2) 6 was scared cuz 7 8 9, so why was 10 scared? Because it was in between 9/11.

3) 10 dead babies.

"I was walking in the yard yesterday and a bug stepped on me. Why, you ask? Because the bug didn't know I was there."

Do you know how to confuse Helen Keller?

Put her in a room and tell her to find the corner.

What do you call Jamieilyah when she is sleeping?

Sleeping Beauty.

What is the difference between you and Iron Man? You have a wonky hairline.

"GWEN, can you help me? There's some person messing with me. There name is JADSA, something like that. Look for a joke named Jayden."

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples get picked. Lel. I hope you guys like this joke.

What do you call a Downey with glasses?

No, me neither.

What do you call a rabbit with a crooked dick?

Fucks funny.

You're so fat that you're gonna be my next hamburger for dinner and the next In-N-Out, just like your parents.

So guys, I have a friend who is named Sarah, and I was riding bikes with her the other day, and she told me she is gay. I totally support her. I love that she is open about it and not scared to tell people about it. I hope you guys can support her too! I love you all! :)))

What do you call a mix of nuts, bolts, and my ex?

A roTHOT.

What did the butt cheek say to the other when you open us a big order of "choochie man" comes out?