You jokes

How do you call somebody who has bought a Corona?

A Cor-owner.

You were born on the highway. That's where all the accidents happen!

I'll pat-your-breasts, pat-your-breasts, cos I'm a baker's man, and you bring me an orgasm as fast as you can. I'll pat you, and prick you, and mark you with my "D", and then put you in the oven for the bitch and me!

I'm happy that I named my dog "I Know What You Did." It's funny to see how much people get scared when I call him.

Are you a lightbulb, cuz you brighten up my day?

What do you call snowmen having sex?

A snowjob.

What do you call a pig that pulled a leg? Pulled pork.

What can you tell [is] the difference between Stephen Hawking and a carrot?

Nothing.

How do you know when German people break into your house? When you can not find your bed.

What time is it when you say, "Wake up?"

It is morning.

What do you call a school bus driver that cannot walk? A silly school bus driver!

Blonde: Can I suck you off? (has STDs on mouth)

Me: Naw (drake turn/dab)

Science gets you to the moon.

Religion flies you into buildings.

If you ever get bored, just hit an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Ever heard of rape jokes?

No?

Well, I'll MAKE you hear 'em!

What do you call a baby that came out of their mother's womb? A virgin.

When you end up pregnant...

Mom told me if a boy touched my breast I should say "DON'T," and if he touched me down there I should say "STOP." But Dad, he touched me both places at once so I said, "DON'T STOP! DON'T STOP!" 😂

Juice WRLD died a legend. Making these jokes won't get you anywhere. Grow up.

A few male neighbors came over to the house to take a shower because, for some reason, their house didn't have water.

A few minutes later, I walk into the shower. I see the male neighbors and Mom taking a shower together. Then I said, "What are you doing?" They all say, "We're taking a shower together so we could save water."

I went to a museum and saw clocks. The owner told me these were lying clocks.

"This is God's clock. It never moved because he never lied."

"This is your clock. It moved 3 times because you lied 3 times."

I asked where is President Trump's clock. He said it was at the equator, spinning super fast for those who were on fire. I laughed so hard because it was so true!