You jokes
You're so skinny, you probably wipe your ass with floss.
What do you call a fish with no eyes? Fsh.
How do you get a million fowl?
You run through Africa with a bullet of water.
Wife: "Honey? What do you think about my teeth?"
Husband: "They remind me of stars... yellow and far apart."
You want an insult? Right, look at the mirror.
You're so bald, the Hair Club for Men has elected you president.
Adopting a kid is like having a yard sale! I mean, if the owners don't want it anymore, what makes you think I want it?
Grass is green. I am the queen. If only I can see you scream on the screen.
Things that rhyme with green, queen, screen: clean, between, been, ...
Teacher: "Hey, James, this is the third time I asked you a question!"
James: "But you told me not to answer you back!"
When you see a woman with a leg chain, what usually comes to your mind?
Sad news, my obese parrot died today.
Mind you, it's a huge weight off my shoulders.
What do you call a flat-chested emo?
A cutting board.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
I did ap.
I did ap who? (I did a poo)
EEWW you did a poo???
I really wanna hit you right now, but that would be animal abuse.
What don't Rick Astley and the Twin Towers have in common?
One won't let you down, while the other will.
Why is a ball rolling when you put it on a hill?
Because it is circle.
When you get home and see your parents with your grades in their hands.
Twenty minutes later, they're slapping you with the belt.
My money don't jiggle jiggle, it folds.
I want to see you wiggle wiggle, for sure.
If you make jokes about SH, you're not funny, and if you do, I'm gonna assume you're some 12-year-old who wants to be an edge lord. I don't really care if people get pressed.
Are you a school? Cause I wanna shoot some kids inside of you.