You jokes

What's the difference between you and your mom?

I slept with your mom.

Why should you put an autistic person in a refrigerator?

Because otherwise you’ll get a rotten vegetable.

(Not meant to be triggering).

Did you hear about the nun that got kicked out of the convent?

She got caught squatting on the cucumbers in the garden.

Have you heard the word of the day? It’s "legs".

Now, let’s go back to my place and I can spread them.

What do you call a rapper who's also a magician?

MC Illusion.

What do you call a rapper who's also a doctor?

Dr. Dre.

What do you call a sad rapper?

A SOB-HOP ARTIST.

What do you call a rapper who loves gardening?

Dr. Dre-seed.

What do you call a rapper who can’t rap?

A wrapper with no FILLING.

What did the rapper say at the bakery?

"I need ALL the dough you got!"

What do you call a dinosaur that raps?

A VELOCI-RAPPER!

How do you know a rapper is ready to cook?

He drops the beet.

What do you call a rapper who can’t rhyme?

Unemployed.

What’s the worst thing about having a wife with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.

What do you call a rapper who LOVES nature?

MC Green

What do you call an @EB with no ears?

An Explain B.

Hitler was talking about how to fight in WW2 when someone sneezed while Hitler was giving a speech, so Hitler yelled, "WHO SNEEZED ROW 1? DID ANYONE SNEEZE?" They said no, and Hitler shot everybody. Same for row 2 & 3, but in row 4 someone nervous said, "Me, I'm sorry." Then Hitler said, "Bless you."

Guys, do not follow Tom, he is super inappropriate. I did a 48-hour face reveal and this is what he said:

Tom 13 minutes ago Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ur so cute I wanna fuck your pussy so hard you look amazing I luv ur face come have sex with me mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

My childhood tormentor was at school. I walked through so I could get to class.

And then he said, "Hey, you donkey!"

I said, "Thank you, I'm so happy that I'm something, not nothing like you!" And I gave him a pink lollipop. He walked off. And I became popular. Or should I say, Lolli-Popular? Sorry.

Everyone when we're in the cafeteria singing happy birthday to some random person: "Happy birthday to you..., Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear

Me in the background: Happy deathday to you..., Happy deathday to you, happy death day dear___, happy death day to you!"