Year jokes

Me and your hairline go way back, years and years.

Spell "Peppa." Okay. P. E. P. P. A. Hahaha! You said peepee.

I tried this with my sister Makenna because she loves Peppa Pig and has a backpack of it. So I told her to spell her backpack's letters and tricked her... And she is only four years old and my secret is I am only eight years old.

This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!

2001 called... they hit the Pentagon.

What's the difference between you and a calendar?

Calendars got dates.

My parents created a joke 11 years ago and people are still laughing at it, but I know it's not me because jokes have meaning.

You're so fat, you lasted a whole year on the cross just off of your fat.

My mom loves balls.

But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.

Your mum eats cabbage.

If y'all look up freshfry jokes, I'll come up. About a year ago, I had a bunch of friends on this app.

"Why are all these orphans here?" said Chris.

"Because their dad went to go get the milk," said MrBeast.

3 Years Later,

"I AM GIVING APPLE IN A SHARE TO EVERY ORPHAN IN THE WORLD, AND I'M ALSO GIVING EACH OF THEM 1000000000000 DOLLARS."

A man is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door.

He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch.

He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.

Three years later there's a knock at the door.

He opens it and sees the same snail.

The snail says, "What was that all about?"

Dad: I'll pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie.

Next day:

Dad: Son, what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen?

Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life, gosh, Dad, you're embarrassing.

The dad sulked for 3 whole years.

Proof that words really can hurt.

I've been looking for my parents for years.

For the life of me, I can't remember where I hid their bodies.

My friend asked me why I haven’t had milk in six years.

I told him my dad never came back with it.

Everyone makes mistakes. Like my mom, she made a mistake 13 years ago.

But you could get plastic surgery and look 20 years younger. With that, no one will suspect you!

According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form contains only four lines:

1. What was your income for the year?

2. What were your expenses?

3. How much have you left?

4. Send it in.

When a 68 year old teacher says: "I am going to tackle an intruder if I have to!"

Me: "Oh hell nah"

What’s the best thing about sex with 119 year olds? There are 100 of them.