Year jokes
Everyone makes mistakes. Like my mom, she made a mistake 13 years ago.
I've been looking for my parents for years.
For the life of me, I can't remember where I hid their bodies.
Your dad left you 10 years ago and you're 10 years old, so your dad anniversary is today.
But you could get plastic surgery and look 20 years younger. With that, no one will suspect you!
According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form contains only four lines:
1. What was your income for the year?
2. What were your expenses?
3. How much have you left?
4. Send it in.
Memes
Happy New Year’s Eve. 2023 was something lol
When a 68 year old teacher says: "I am going to tackle an intruder if I have to!"
Me: "Oh hell nah"
I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."
What are they going to say about Tim Gunn in 20 years?
He kicked the bucket.
What's the difference between fathers and hurricanes?
Nothing. They both destroy families and then leave for a couple of years.
Hey, guess what I got for my birthday.
No, what did you get? Older.
Man, everybody's birthday is this year! 🤦🏽♂️
What's the difference between 20 and 14?
9 to 10 years.
What’s the best thing about sex with 119 year olds? There are 100 of them.
Yo Mama is so fat that Nationwide took nine years to get on her side.
The humor of this generation of kids shouldn't be called 'brain rot'; it should be called 'brain rape.' I believe most people of this generation that aren't 5-year-olds could agree with me, but my mind and thoughts have been violated by the things that kids these days find funny and entertaining. #SKIBIDDI
What is the difference between 9/11 and a cow?
You stop milking a cow after 15 years.
Rachel won the lottery twice in two years. Her friend Jim called her every day asking for tips on winning, just the same. Then one day, simply to get rid of him, Rachel said, "Watch two martial arts movies, eat three pieces of hard beef jerky, and pick a fight at a bar."
Jim replied with a shocked look, "That's what I do after Mr. Tugman shakes my hand too long."
I hope I'm not a big pain, but Jordan C, please stop bothering me about my age! I know I am 8 years old, but enough.
Then you make jokes about how smart I am and intimidate me because of my name. I don't remember intimidating you for anything. So please, with all due respect, stop.
PS It's not for drama, it's because you're bullying me for nothing. I come here just to joke or be nice to people, not for the drama. So please again. Stop. That is all I ask.
Thank you.
Don't say you want to eat out a five-year-old's pussy, because I have already shoved a glass dildo in her tight ass pussy, UwU.
What weighs 70 pounds and doesn't like sex?
The 6-year-old in the trunk of my car.