Year jokes

I cleaned my room today. While sweeping under the bed, I heard my mop collide with something. To my surprise, I found Pristiano Penaldo hiding under my bed! My dad said, “Don’t bother sweeping him son, he’s been dusted for years.” I was shocked but not surprised.

Why is 2020 the worst year? Because COVID-19!

Guys, I know this is kinda weird, but everyone who wants to... Put your name and your age in the comment section. Not address though because that would not be good for creepers... Lol I am Lucy and I am 15 years old. What about you guys? :D

What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years?

A war of nutrition.

R. Kelly contracted COVID-19 recently. He was quoted as saying it was the first time he caught a case of anything over 18 in years.

My brother went missing 5 years ago. He also supported TRUMP. He is currently dead in my basement in a chest in a cupboard.

My sis came up to me and said, "Mom told me to take the trash out for the rest of the year."

"So, uh, you free tomorrow?" 😂

A 10 year old girl reported to her friends that her 16 year old male babysitter was touching her inappropriately. He quickly lost his job as a babysitter.

A 10 year old boy reported to his friends that his 16 year old female babysitter was touching him inappropriately. She quickly became the most popular babysitter in town amongst boys.

This is 15 first-year treating a swan.

Students return: "Without payment?"

The word "I die with many important problems."

Later, you answer this point: "DSD, rats?"

Why do orphans have 363 days in a year?

Because they have no Father's or Mother's days.

I pulled my kid out of school after a woke teacher taught my six-year-old about pronouns! Yesterday, it was "he/she," today, "they/it," tomorrow, "I/you/we!"

NEWS: A man kidnapped a 13-year-old girl.

MOM OF GIRL: The man had a shady face and a receding hairline.

Yo Mama is so fat that Nationwide took nine years to get on her side.

2001 called... they hit the Pentagon.

Me and your hairline go way back, years and years.

You're so fat, you lasted a whole year on the cross just off of your fat.

This year the London marathon was run on your hairline. It was so far back no one could complete it!

What's the difference between you and a calendar?

Calendars got dates.

I traveled through time to get my dad back.

I failed because I was 1e21 years off.

Spell "Peppa." Okay. P. E. P. P. A. Hahaha! You said peepee.

I tried this with my sister Makenna because she loves Peppa Pig and has a backpack of it. So I told her to spell her backpack's letters and tricked her... And she is only four years old and my secret is I am only eight years old.